


A Little Less

by destinysbastard



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anxiety, Blood Drinking, Blood Feeding, Blood Play, Cheer Up Sex, Depression, Eating out, F/M, Fluff, Mental Illness, Morning Sex, Oh, Smut, Vaginal Sex, aaaah okay i love this actually :), i wanna cry after writing this omg, in a consensual and erotic way, or well, oral sex (female receiving), so much loooove, vampire, very consensual, very emotional, very sensual and intimate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-06 19:55:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11607834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destinysbastard/pseuds/destinysbastard
Summary: The reader struggles with depression and anxiety; one morning she wakes up and it's quite bad.But Benny is always there to cheer her up, hold her, give her whatever she needs. And she wants to give him everything he needs too.DISCLAIMER:Writing this, I am NOT saying that depression and/or anxiety is like this for everyone. Every person expierences it differently, and I wrote this from my own experiences with it. The reader in this story experiences it in a way where she has episodes, sometimes it's better, other days it's not, and here she's just struggling with getting up, facing daily life as she feels completely exhausted and empty as well as anxious.NEITHER do I want to convey with this story that mental illness and its symptoms are "cured" or all good if you just have someone to kiss and some sex blah blah - but it can be good to have someone to talk to or to simply be there for you and support and love you all through your pain and bad days, as well as the good ones. This is just a little story because I imagined how nice it would be to wake up next to Benny in the morning and I am just fucking weak for this kind of damn loving sex. So yeah, that's all it is, I hope you enjoy it. :)





	A Little Less

**Author's Note:**

> This idea came to mind a while ago, but I never felt especially inspired to write it - until today. I woke up and spent the whole morning just writing this, unable to stop once I'd started. Oops. Hah  
> But it just turned into this amazingly sensual and loving and emotionally bonding scene, I just got emotional myself, which certainly doesn't always happen while writing.  
> So I'm just really happy about this and excited to put it on here and get some feedback and BLESS EVERYONE'S FEED WITH SOME BENNY FLUFF AND SMUT. OF WHICH THE WORLD CLEARLY NEEDS MORE. MUCH MORE.  
> Yeah so I hope you enjoy it!! Please read the tags for warning (mental illnesses) and the Disclaimer in the summary.  
> NOW ENJOY my dirty little doves and leave kudos n comments :)
> 
> \- Also MUSIC inspirations while writing this which might fit while reading: Oh wonder, coldplay and John Mayer (especially the album 'Head full of Dreams' by Coldplay, 'Landslide', 'Livewire' and 'Ultralife' by Oh Wonder and 'Rosie' by John)

Depression doesn't follow a schedule. Neither does anxiety or any of those fuckers.

There's mornings when you wake up and you immediately know you'd be better off sleeping another 7 years. And today was one of those days.

As you opened your eyes and adjusted to the light that flooded in through the window, you soon felt a heaviness that came out of nowhere weigh on your heart.

Today you had the day off, but you had planned dinner with an old friend, as well as a few things you needed to get done like laundry, replying to some emails etc. It wasn't a big deal, was it? But somehow you felt your throat tighten and your eyes close shut only at the thought of getting out of bed, talking to anyone, _existing_.

It was very confusing sometimes: In a way you felt anxious about all that, nervous or worried, you might say. But at the same time you felt strangely empty and yet heavy – just tired, completely exhausted after a full night's sleep; listless.

This weird combination oftentimes had you feeling completely unable to do things, and then worry about the consequences of that.

„Good mornin', Cher,“ you heard Benny groan beside you. You'd barely registered him waking up and moving, not until he lazily put his arm around you.

You felt yourself immediately tense up, almost flinch at the touch.

Of course he noticed.

„You okay?“ he asked, seeming more awake now.

You breathed in. „'M fine,“ is all you mumbled.

As much as you loved this man, loved waking up next to him in the morning, hearing his raspy, sleepy southern drawl right by your ear, today you just felt overwhelmed by all of your senses, terribly irritable, and all you wanted to do was bury yourself underneath your blanket, shutting the whole world out.

„Cher, I know you're not. C'mon, look at me.“

It took all of you to turn around, only after a moment, and face him.

You couldn't look him in the eye. You hated talking about those things, or just letting him see that part of you.

You had tried to keep that „baggage“ away from him. But it was pointless. There was nothing you could keep from him, he just knew you too well, always sensed it when something was wrong. And it wasn't a problem for him either, he loved you just as much after finding out and was always there for you when you went through a rough patch.

You were managing it alright, but it kept coming back out of nowhere. You hated talking about it and letting him see you at your most vulnerable and when you felt like you were completely defeated, but eventually you realized you needed to let him in. He was just trying to help, and as hard as it was for you in the beginning, you were truly happy to have him.

„What's going on?“ he asked, gently brushing your cheek with his hand. This time you didn't flinch and tried to relax into his touch.

You sighed, closing your eyes.

„Today's just one of those mornings I wish I hadn't woken up...“

You weren't looking at Benny, but you could imagine what his face probably looked like; somewhat sad. Was it pity you saw in those sky blue eyes, or were you only imagining it?

„Cher,“ he whispered and lifted your chin up a bit. You opened your eyes.

„If there's anythin' I can do... You know I'm here to talk anytime.“

You nodded.

„But I can certainly also make your morning worthwhile other ways...“ he added, accompanied by a dirty little wink and the most handsome grin in the whole world.

He knew you hated talking about it, but wanted to make sure you could if you needed to; he just wanted to give you whatever you needed. Once again you were hit by the realization of how much he really cared.

„I don't know if I'm up for that,“ you said honestly, now bringing your hand up to caress his which was still on your cheek.

„We can also just do a lil' bit of kissin',“ he said charmingly, „or I can make ya some breakfast; or we can take a shower, save some water; or we could just postpone everything and watch Disney movies all day...“

You couldn't help but smile at that. „How do I deserve you?“ you asked lovingly, moving in to kiss him softly.

„I wonder the same thing 'bout you every day,“ he cooed.

You smiled against him and your lips met again for a lazy and soft morning kiss; and the whole world seemed to slow down for a few seconds.

Benny's strong hands gently caressed your arms and sides, and you finally completely relaxed into his touch and hold. You loved how he always managed to be so strong and yet gentle with you.

Both ways were perfect; depending on what you both needed. Some nights it was rough and needy, pleasure almost hard to tell apart from pain, Benny showing you exactly who you belonged to; other nights it felt like an eternity of love and just feeling each other in the most intimate ways.

Slowly he moved to your jaw, then to your neck with little kisses. He halted by your pulse point, gingerly licking and kissing your tender skin there.

In his athletic arms and underneath his loving kisses and hums you felt yourself nearly melting away, your head finally clearing a bit, though racing just like your heart. A low moan escaped your lips as he brushed his hands along your ribcage, sending a shiver all over your skin. Maybe you were more in the mood than you'd thought...

You could tell he was holding back, just planting soft kisses here and there, discreetly drawing circles into your back with his thumb.

Right then, completely embedded in his tender love and care, all you truly wanted to do was entirely give yourself over to him. Give him _everything_.

„Benny,“ you whispered, to which he lifted his head from your neck and looked at you with those ridiculously blue eyes. „Mmh? Should I stop?“ he asked.

You smiled at the vampire in front of you, your heart jumping lightly as he proved to you once again just how much he cared.

With a soft chuckle you replied, „No, no... Actually I was thinking rather the opposite.“

He responded with an adorable grin. „Oh.“ Obviously he was quite delighted with what you'd just said.

„You sure?“ he needed to check again. You just nodded, running your hand along his neck and through his short hair.

„Alright, cher. But tell me if you need me to stop,“ he said, looking at you seriously. „I will, Benny,“ you replied, reassuring him that it was okay.

He gave you one last smile before diving back down into the crook of your neck, again kissing, this time not holding back from sucking and nibbling at your delicate skin. His mouth travelled down, kissing your collarbone, eventually coming to your breasts, which he tenderly kissed and massaged, drawing circles and pinching them every once in a while. You arched your back to give him better access and he smiled against your skin, lightly scratching you with his stubble.

All you could think of was how that stubble would feel against your thighs.

And he surely didn't disappoint, soon moving towards your center.

His hands moved along your thighs, squeezing your flesh and then he anchored his fingers on your hips, holding you tight as he started licking towards your folds, which he found dripping wet.

Deliciously, his stubble scratched your thighs as his tongue explored your depths, making you writhe above him. „ _Benny_ ,“ you whimpered, unsure what exactly you were trying to convey.

He looked up – oh _what a sight_ , his lusty blue eyes looking up at you with that mischief in them – and asked if you wanted him to stop.

As amazing as it felt, you were craving Benny, his body close to yours, moving in sync with you.

„Need you, Benny, need you closer,“ you said under your breath.

He planted one last kiss on your thigh and then moved up to meet your lips. His whole body was covering you, the pressure of his warm muscles just right to make you feel safe but not confined.

„How d'you want me, darlin'?“ he asked teasingly.

You felt his hard-on through his boxers and you teasingly, needily ground up against him.

„Need you inside of me, want to feel you close,“ you breathed.

„Well, I can give you that,“ he purred into your ear, thereupon mildly biting and licking your earlobe. You felt his hot breath against your ear and your body shook. You needed him _now._

„ _Benny_ ,“ you wept again.

„I know, I know, _Cher_.“

He kissed you one more time, and you ran your hands across his shoulders and chest, lightly scratching as well as caressing him while he pulled down his boxers, his erection springing free.

Before aligning his length with your aching pussy, he looked up at you once more, always with that smug, charming grin; and in that moment you swore: this man would be the death of you.

Carefully stroking your stomach and hips, he pushed into you at a rather slow pace.

You exhaled, automatically pushing against him, closing your eyes and completely swimming in that wonderful feeling of being so _full_ with and so _close_ to him.

„Alright?“ he asked warmly and you opened your eyes, to meet his, almost losing yourself in that kind blue again.

„Cher?“ You only now realized you hadn't replied, and he probably thought something was wrong.

„Yes, yes, it's _perfect,_ “ you quickly answered, running your hands across his arms and up to his shoulders.

„Benny,“ you purred as you pulled him down to you. „ _I love you so_.“

You were both very still as you looked into each other's eyes and then kissed softly and slowly.

„Oh cher, and I love _you_ ,“ he replied quietly, and that's all that mattered in that moment.

He kissed you again, your lips only quickly brushing with a light _smack_ ; and then, staying right there, leaning his head against yours, he started moving inside you.

He pulled out and pushed back inside, and soon he started thrusting into you a bit faster, but still at a rather slow pace; snapping his hips into you just right.

Soon you were both a hot, quivering mess, panting and moaning into each other's mouths.

„ _Oh, Benny_ ,“ you sobbed. A tight knot had started to build up in your lower stomach, intensifying with every of Benny's thrusts. He let forth low groans and moans as he kept pushing, now getting steadily faster. He dipped his head down onto your shoulder, half into your neck where you felt his hot breath blowing over your even hotter skin.

_Everything._

„Take all you need,“ you whispered and he knew what you meant.

„You sure?“

„ _Yes_ ,“ you brought forth, his thrusts taking away your breath.

His strubble scratched along your neck as he licked his way to your pulse point.

„But don' come yet, I want to look at you when you do,“ he said, his voice raspy and a little out of breath too.

You felt your heart start to race and pick up a fast pace as he revealed his set of vampire teeth and soon, cautiously bit down into your tender skin, hot red blood pearling right away.

Your spine curved and your back arched as you tilted your head back to give him better access.

He was still continuously pushing in and out of you.

It didn't take long 'till you felt that perfect rush of endorphines mixed with adrenaline flood your veins, first making you open your eyes and breathe in sharply, both because of the stinging pain and the wave of energy and pleasure flushing through you; then warmth and softness took over your body and you relaxed into the mattress, melting away underneath Benny.

He didn't take much, not wanting to hurt you (the few times you'd done this he'd always been extremely cautious, even though you were never scared; you knew he wouldn't hurt you); but it felt like minutes of swimming in that perfect high.

You didn't think you'd make it through without coming yet, as you felt the adrenaline intensify your arousal and then as your muscles unclenched, taking away any and all of your control. You were _so damn close,_ and you started to whimper again, needing the release so damn badly but not wanting to come before Benny told you to.

After breaking the bite, and licking off the rest of the blood pearling out until the wound closed, Benny lifted his head to look at you. The blue in his eyes seemed intensified by the red around his lips and his blown-up pupils that stared at you from hungry and simultaneously blissed-out eyes were the hottest thing you'd ever seen.

His thrusts had slowed down as you'd both entered that blood high; now he picked up speed again and started slamming into you, sending waves of shock through your body, leaving you with soundless moans, almost falling apart.

„ _Benny, can't_ -“ you started, but he cut you off.

„I know, Cher,“ he breathed. „'S okay.“

He thrust into you twice more and then growled, „ _Come for me_.“

It didn't take much for you to obey, as he pushed into you a few more times and you finally let yourself lose control completely.

The knot in your stomach exploded, and countless shivers ran through your skin as your pussy started to clench and unclench, while he was still ramming into you, chasing his own high.

He watched you as you tilted your head back and screamed, „ _Benny, oh Benny“_ over and over again. Close after you he also came, grunting and growling your name, claiming your lips once more, swallowing both of your blissed-out shouts and cries.

He rode you through both of your highs and then started to slow down, eventually came to a halt and, still resting on his arms on either side of your head, just breathed hard for a moment.

You closed your eyes, exhaustion and bliss washing over you, very aware of all the places Benny's skin was touching yours – his stomach, your legs, his softening cock still inside of you.

You opened your eyes and he was staring right back at you, a little bit of a smile hiding in there.

After slipping out of you and discarding the condom, he lay down next to you.

You both just lay there for a moment, catching your breaths again.

Then Benny turned to you and caressed the skin on your arm. „You okay?“ he asked.

You nodded, closed your eyes and inhaled deeply. Then you turned onto your side to face Benny. „Very.“

He smiled at you, kindness was buried in the crinkles around his eyes. Sometimes you couldn't bear just how much you loved him.

Shuffling closer to him, you put your arms around him, he pulled you flush against him and your legs entangled, like they always did.

„I can't believe how much I love you, Benny,“ you said, overwhelmed by your feelings, just a little bit.

He pulled you even closer, if that was possible, and buried his face in the crook of your neck. You had never felt safer. „Don't know what to say,“ he mumbled against your skin.

After a moment he broke the embrace to look at you, his face just inches from yours.

„You're the best damn thing that ever happened to me, darlin',“ he eventually said.

You smiled, feeling tears well in your eyes. He kissed you and you kissed him back hungrily, passionately, tongues twirling, you smiling against his lips, his stubble brushing against you just right.

You stayed like that for a long time, intertwined, simply breathing into each other, sharing petite kisses again and again, eventually drifting off to sleep again, just for a little while.

When you woke up, the bed was empty, and you needed a moment to figure out what time it was, feeling a bit disoriented as you often did after naps.

You got up, put on a shirt of Benny's and followed the little noises that were coming from the direction of the kitchen.

Benny was standing behind the counter, busy making pancakes, a rather big stack already made, sitting on a plate by the stove, waiting to be devoured.

You just stood in the doorframe for a moment, admiring the view in front of you.

Noticing your stomach grumbling from hunger, you made your way towards Benny and put your arms around his waist from behind.

„Slept well, darlin'?“ he purred and you answered with a content „yes“.

„Hungry?“

„Oh, do you even need to ask?“ you grinned.

He chuckled and put the last pancake on the already made stack. You put everything on the table and hungrily devoured the fluffy goodness your Benny had prepared.

Nobody could change the fact that you sometimes felt this way, depressed, anxious, defeated and so many more things; or sometimes nothing at all. But you were constantly reminded how good it was you'd let someone in, let someone see and help.

You still felt scared and heavy, but with Benny by your side just a little less.

And that meant a lot.

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
